What She Needed To Say Before Goodbye

Dedicated to Eva.

When we moved to London I embarked on a journey of reinventing myself. I decided I didn't want to build a new life with the same pieces of my previous life. I wanted to do something that illuminated my unique talents and I wanted to be self-sufficient in the endeavor. So I decided to become a Medium.

One day when I dropped my son off for school one of his teachers commented that I looked nice and asked where I was going. I told her I was taking some classes. "Oh? What are you studying?". I panicked then told her the eccentric truth. "Well, if you ever want to practice, I'm the perfect person to practice on. I don't believe in that stuff."

At the end of the school year she approached me again and told me she was ready to have a reading. Throughout the year we had gotten to know one another a bit. I knew that her dad died when she was a kid. I knew that her and her partner had split up and that they had two kids. I knew she was a DJ and music producer and that we had a mutual music connection back in Boston. And I knew she was still a skeptic.

When I arrived at her home I was "told" that I needed to start by giving her some healing. I was told to ground her and help open her heart chakra. I then began with an angelic reading, giving her loving advice and insights to her relationships and their futures. Then her father stepped in.

I get really, really nervous when I connect with loved ones in Spirit. I want to honor the relationship. I want my link and evidence to be perfect. I want to help heal. So when I saw him, the person she'd want to hear from IF she believed it possible, I became very anxious. I immediately knew that he did not cross over, as his sudden death would leave his two young children fatherless. And they had already been through so much. The divorce. The move overseas. So he stayed with his daughter, son and second wife energetically.

I asked him to tell me how he passed. Heart attack. I asked him to show or tell me things that his daughter would understand. He gave me "Ain't No Sunshine", walking in the woods and "I love you, Buttercup." She confirmed that he died from a heart attack and that walking in the woods was their thing. She couldn't take the rest.

Her kids arrived home so we wrapped up the reading abruptly. I hadn't proved the continuity of her father's life after death so I didn't ask for a message and I didn't cross his spirit over. In fact, he refused to let me. He needed to talk to his daughter first.

By the time that I got home I had a message from her asking if she could call me. When I rang she sounded freaked out. She told me that after I left she phoned her ex-partner but that she got a crossed line on her cell. She could hear a man talking on the other line. Then she heard her ex say her name.

I then knew that she had become a believer, that her father had spoken to her and that I could cross him over. And I did.

The other day I received a text from her that said that a friend of hers had died unexpectedly and she wanted to know if she was ok. The friend had been undergoing cancer treatment for a year, then her health took a dramatic turn for the worse. She passed one week after being hospitalized, leaving her eight-year-old-child motherless.

I knew the answer before tuning in. I found her friend in a state of shock. Looking into a hospital room that blended into her child's bedroom. She was crying and desperate to get to her daughter. I approached the earthbound spirit and told her that her friend had sent me. I asked her if I could help her and I told her that after I helped her we would talk. She nodded silently through her seemingly endless tears.

I asked the angelic realm for her healing. I saw fragments of her spirit return to her body. I saw the energy of the chemotherapy leave her body. She was bathed in love and in light then transformed to an almost angelic looking energy herself.

Next I asked her what she needed. She wanted her sister to agree to become a mother to her daughter. She wanted to be involved with decisions related to her daughter. And she wanted to say goodbye.

I was told that I needed to wait to cross her over as her energy needed to stabilize, that I needed to continue to send healing and I needed to relay her messages. I hesitated. I had never met this woman and I knew that everyone who cared for her was in pain. I did not want to add to it. What if what I was given was wrong? But what if it was right?

I passed the message along and sent healing the next day.

On the third day I spent the morning with my husband. We took a walk along the Thames, strolled into the Tate Modern shop and I walked over to the Children's book section. I picked up "The Fox and The Star" by Coralie Pickford-Smith. I put it down and walked away. I returned and picked it up. I put it down and walked away. I picked it back up and purchased it.

Then I walked to a park to meditate, to see how the woman was and to find out whether or not I could help crossover her spirit. As soon as I closed my eyes I could see her. "I need you to get a message to Eva," she communicated. I took out my phone and typed what was dictated.

Dear Eva,
I'm sorry. It's not fair that I had to leave before you were grown. There is so much I wanted to do with you, like pick out a puppy.
I want you to know that a piece of me will always live in your heart. If you ever need me, look to the stars and know I am with you.
Please let Nanny love you and help take care of you. Be strong, be brave and always remember how proud I am that you are my daughter.
I'll love you for an eternity, V.

She said thank you and the angels crossed her into the light.

I felt sick to my stomach as I read back all the specific details that I COULD have heard wrong. I felt sick about passing this message on. What if? But I typed the text to my son's former teacher and hit "send". Then I heard, "Look at the book."

"The Fox and The Star."

The book was for Eva and the message was the inscription. I took a photo of the book and sent that too.

Then I read the story for the first time.

He knew that 
out there was
a star that
once was his.

I highly recommend this book to any dreamer, anyone who may have lost their star or anyone who has a hard time believing. Back Cover: "Once there was a Fox who lived in a deep, dense forest. For as long as Fox could remember, his only friend had been Star, who lit the forest paths for Fox each night. But then one night, Star was not there, and Fox had to face the darkness all alone..."

What My Grandfather Shared From Spirit

Every Tuesday night for the last year I've sat in a closed physical mediumship circle held at Clearly Destiny in London. The Medium, Tracey Hood, sits in a small enclosed structure known as a cabinet. The circle, a group of people who commit to giving their energy over to the Medium and to Spirit, sit in the dark with hands and feet touching. There is a table in the center of the room that holds an aluminum cone, known as a trumpet. There are strips of glow-in-the-dark material throughout the room. Music is played and the home circle sings along, to raise the vibration in the room.

The intention is that Spirit will use the body and psychic energy of the Medium to produce physical phenomenon. The circle acts as a battery to power the Medium and the hope is that ectoplasm will be produced and objects will levitate or spirits will manifest.

These type of seances were popular during Victorian London, but were soon infiltrated by con-artists. People became skeptical and as a result many attendees challenged what was experienced, often causing physical harm or even the death of the Medium. 

Tracey has been sitting in the cabinet for a few years now and is amongst a select few world-wide who are facilitating phenomena. Due to the infamous past of physical mediumship, modern Mediums have developed a strict set of protocols for the health and safety of the Medium, as well as to establish authenticity of what is experienced during a seance.

Last Spring I was invited to become the Circle Leader. This means that it is my responsibility to keep the Medium safe and that protocols are adhered to. It also means that I sit as an energetic battery, while receiving direction from Tracey's Spirit Team. For the most part, I act as a commentator to the group, acknowledging when loved ones step closer, when there are flashes of light, when there is activity at the table and trumpet.

Tonight's seance herald the evolution of the craft.

As soon as the lights went out I saw black on black shadows begin to gather in the room. The energies stood very close to myself and the cabinet and it begun to feel as though my face was being wrapped in cobwebs. I was "told" that our loved ones were gathering and that each member of the circle had four energies with them.

For the past few months we have enjoyed visits from the father of one of the members of the circle. Tonight I was told that our loved ones were supporting Christine's dad to manifest. To do so, each of us needed to acknowledge the presence of our loved ones. I had a sense of my mother's dad, Buppa, and my father's mother, Granny B. I "asked" that my grandparents make themselves known to me, beyond sensing them. Within moments a wavy violet orb, that floated like a jellyfish, emerged and wafted over to me. As the energy drew close I was shown something like a family album flip book.

Eyes wide open, I saw in my mind's eye a black and white photo of my grandfather as a toddler. He was dressed up for church and was all smiles. The photo seemed to transform into a family movie, with the action sped up. Soon images and vignettes began to play.

Buppa and his older sister selling ice-cream by the road side of the family farm. The little boy rejoicing over the penny payment.

An awkward teenager hunch over his school desk, learning and dreaming about the future.

The prideful young man who cleaned the college in order to finance his education.

The soldier driving along side of the train that carried his future wife, who missed their rendezvous on the eve of their elopement.

The fighter pilot, who during World War II, stole a few moments of joy as he floated in the clouds over beautiful land and water.

The father at Christmas, watching his two sons and daughter opening presents.

The grandfather who carried his first grandchild in his arms, kissed her chubby cheeks and forever kept her heart close to his.

Each vignette was infused with the powerful joy and happiness that my grandfather felt. And as I sobbed quietly in the dark, what my grandfather remembered and shared was that he had lived and he had loved.

I could hear sobs also come from Christine and other members of the circle. I asked them what their loved ones were sharing and for some, it was this family photo experience.

I was struck by how remarkable this demonstration of phenomenon was. Most mediums act as the translator between us and our loved ones. The medium is the one to experience our loved ones, as they bring forth evidence to prove the continuity of life and to deliver messages of love and healing. But tonight, the phenomenon was personal. I felt. I saw.

Tonight the trumpet rose and the table tipped and twirled around the room. And it was amazing. But everything pales to the lifetime that I experienced during the minutes that Buppa's spirit stepped into mine, weaving in evidence and messages of love. 

Love is eternal. It is without dimensions. It is without form. 

Loving my grandfather now, like this, is something I hope that every heart broken by the loss of their loved one's life can experience.

Channelled Communication With The Pathway Collective

The following was channelled communication received on the 28th of September 2015 at Clearly Destiny and first shared on clearlydestiny.london.

Response to a question on how angels and archangels have come into being:

It is true that angelic energies have incarnated at some point in time and space, which is why they bear resemblance to mankind.  Their energy and vibration is such that they appear to many as orbs of light with colour and, to some, to have the appearance of wings.  It is energy that allows them to move between dimensions and plains— as their energy has a tangible, solid quality to it.  

We each have experiences of the 3rd dimension up to the 12th dimension throughout the cycles of our infinite number of lives.  Part of the stream of a multidimensional reality is so that we may move between the physical realms and energetic realms— being able to choose which we want to experience. We may choose to go back and forth to a physical reality of touch, tastes, smells, sight and hearing, or one that is pure energy, bliss and knowing, however void of the sentimentality of our more human experiences. 

Archangels have had human life times but are not wholly of a human existence.  They are the embodiment of what you understand as the Higher Self.  Embodiment is just a word to explain the containment of force and energy.  These archangels take on a persona and a force of nature as they grow and flourish with the intention to interact with humankind. This amplifies and reverberates the miracles, the comfort and the messages that humans receive from the Divine messengers known as archangels.  

This is to say that the energy of Archangel Michael is comprised of several thousand human experiences, achieved simultaneously across dimensions and plains that then blend for higher consciousness and energy.  That energy then grows and is amplified by the awareness of the energy amongst prophets on the human plain.   That amplified energy takes on a persona as it is named the Archangel Michael energy and shared and taught to people on the human plain.  This energy continues to reverberate and grow, creating a force to be reckoned with, creating the Protector of Humanity and the Legion of Light.  So the energy is a composition of both human experiences, thoughts and energy over an eternity.

 How did each archangel receive the responsibilities they have?

It was the sum of their expertise accumulated over their human incarnations, combined with their natural aptitudes for certain areas of oversight.  Their intelligence and energetic influence expanded, becoming infinite and all seeing. 

There are many other archangels beyond what original prophets have described, beyond the original channels of doctrine.  They also take form in other religions though they are not recognisable as angelic energies per se. The energies take on the characteristics of cultures and belief systems but ultimately their ascension and evolutions is of a similar path.

 Response to a request for a name for the communicators.

We are a collective of energies that are also on a path of ascension.  We have incarnated and accumulated wisdom from the spectrum of human experiences and emotions of both light and darkness.  We are like molecules of the Higher Self and in good time shall ascend into a form and energy akin to these archangels that you know of now.  But now is not our time to name ourselves, as we are on the beginning paths of this journey.  We follow in the footsteps to aspire to be more than what we are. To allow our egos to be absorbed and transmuted within the energies that we are accumulating and growing.

Response to share who the Channel is.

We don't want anyone of us to be in the spotlight as it is a distraction. 

Response to question on demons.

To clarify the concept of demons and darkness - the logic of the archangels and demons follows a similar trajectory. It is an accumulation of human experience that then becomes amplified, mystified and altered into shapes and features of nightmares.  This is a key to removing these energies and attachments— to link to their human aspect, long buried, understanding that their humanity is pieces of thousands of experiences. You just need the spark of only one human lifetime to be able to weaken the force of these possessions.   

Their purpose is to teach, but through necessity.  It's to teach through trials and tribulations that ultimately give us an opportunity to expand our consciousness and walk our path at a much quicker rate and much greater capacity, had we not had these experiences.  

We say this to remove the fear so that those who experience dark energies, as either the host or the healer.   Reduce the attachment or possession to a human connection and an experience that is ultimately a transformational lesson.

We will leave you with this.  Each incarnated energy that exists on your plain and dimension is part of these collective energies.  The ascension is to allow physical experiences to exhist parallel to energetic experiences.  Part of the challenge is that when one learns seemingly everything— to heal, to sustain life, to have limitless human experiences of joy—  then a deep isolation, boredom and unhappiness and settles within this utopian reality.  Which is why we experiment to find the balance of bliss and health because infinity can be a prison in this state, not necessarily the paradise that many of you imagine it to be. 

The experiment is what gives us hope, energy and excitement to find a balance for these universal truths to be shared and embodied, while understanding how not to create a state of dis-ease within the host of these experiences.